◊ A young woman takes her troubles to a therapist. “You must help me,” she pleaded. “Its gotten to that every time I date a nice guy, I end up in bed with him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week.”
“I see,” nodded the therapist. “And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve this matter.” “For God’s sake, NO!” exclaimed the woman. “I want you to fix it so I won’t feel guilty and depressed afterward.”
◊What happens when a therapist and a prostitute spend the night together? In the morning each of them says “120 dollars, please.”
◊Once I had multiple personalities, but now we are feeling well.
◊Hypochondria is the only illness that I don’t have.
◊Why is therapy sometimes a lot quicker for a man than a woman? Because when it’s time to go back to childhood, a man is already there.
◊Patient to therapist-“I have a ringing in my ears.” Therapist to patient-“Don’t answer.” ◊Patient to therapist-“I think I’m a cat.” Therapist to patient-“How long has this been going on?” Patient to therapist-“Oh, since I was a kitten.”
A therapist is having dinner with a colleague. He tells his friend “The world is getting crazier by the minute.” His colleague replies “So what’s the problem. We should have a good year next year.”
Source: Gary R’nel
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