Patient to Therapist: People tell me I am a wheelbarrow. Therapist to Patient: Don’t let people push you around.
Patient to Therapist: People keep telling me I’m ugly. Therapist to Patient: Lay on the couch, face down.
The mother of a problem child was advised by a therapist, “You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly.” On her next visit the therapist asked, “Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?” “Yes,” the boy’s mother answered. “And how is your son now?” the therapist asked. “Who cares?” the mother replied.
After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer’s file and called him into his office. “Mr. Haroldson, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you are ready to go home. I am only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around the neck.” “Oh, he didn’t kill himself,” Mr. Haroldson replied. “I hung him up to dry.”
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